My Life as A Vampire

Thought I will give it a try with the good-looking cover but nah I'm out XD

This is so bad it becomes good. I laughed my ass off. 

At least the ebola "manga" with the 3D models was intentionally aiming to offend.

This is just genuinely bad.

This is top tier shitposting.

Dear Bryan Woods, it seems that you uploaded your manga yourself so I believe you will look at the comments section.

Here is my reaction, page by page, reading the first chapter. I hope it will help you understanding what you need to change in your manga :

Spoiler

page 1

Omg, comic sans ms... some fonts should be illegal.

Ugh, text blocks, I hate text blocks. And please use some punctuation, you know commas, dots. That makes text blocks much more readable.

I don't know if you're a native speaker of English, but anyway you should ask someone to proofread your text. Some sentences don't make any sense, tenses are not coherent etc.

 

I'll skip page 2

 

page 3

Are you trying out avant-garde manga? Because if you aren't, please don't mix photographs and drawings. My eyes are bleeding.

 

"it's exactly like the manga" --> "to my surprise it was exactly as the manga has described". No need to repeat yourself, I think all the readers understood that it was exactly as in the manga. Btw it'd be nice to know what kind of manga it is, just a title would be nice.

 

...What is a "just before image"? Did the castle disappear at some point? Explanation please.

But I think the main issue you should adress here is : why the hell would there be a European-style castle in the middle of the Japanese countryside!!!!

 

page 4

The seasons in the different panels don't match. Is it spring? fall? winter?

 

Using photographs is a thing, but please use decent quality photographs... I'm crying tears of blood here.

And I bet someone was standing in that photo and you erased them with those yellowish blocks. Couldn't you find a picture with no one inside?

Once again, it's the fucking Japanese countryside!!! After a European-style castle, we get an American colonial house?

 

I have no idea what's being said in the last panel. What I get is that the real estate agent said a family of three lived there? or maybe they still live there...some background, please. Who the heck are the Yasumori...

Seriously, if you have space to put useless panels, please find space to add panels that help the story make some sense.

 

page 5 

 

Seriously what season are we in?

 

What feels off? Care to explain?

Wasn't he in a bamboo forest just a few hours ago? Where did the oak trees come from?

Eww, I don't want to say anything about that sfx.

 

Wasn't it night? Why did it become sunny all of a sudden? Why is it dark again? Does the MC emit light or what? Are they Stephanie Meyers style sparkly vampires? Why is it not making any sense? Am I the one who's becoming weird? Huh? Huuuh?

 

Oh, so the mc is American?Nice to know...why wasn't it said at the beginning!? Btw I still don't even know the mc's name...

 

page 6

 

...I give up, there is no coherence in the backgrounds.

 

Wait, what feels off is that you LIKE the village?

 

Okay, some strange ponytail pink-haired girl just implied she isn't human and it's completely normal...

"others may see her as a demon or a monster", I wouldn't know, because YOU SKIPPED THE PART WHERE SHE SAID WHAT SHE WAS

 

Thank god it was the last page, I was starting to lose my calm.

 

 

I get it that you're going for some kind of mysterious feel. Some pro mangaka manage very well to keep readers into their story without having to explain the characters' background, motivations or the whole situation they are in. But that's only because they know how to make you want to know all that stuff.

If you're a beginner you should start with easy storytelling : state clearly who your characters are, what their goals are and where you story is going. If not, people will stop reading after two pages.

 

Bad art can rebute people, but if the story's interesting enough they'll keep reading. Just look at One Man Punch.

thank you I will do my best to fix some of the errors

Dear Bryan Woods, it seems that you uploaded your manga yourself so I believe you will look at the comments section.

Here is my reaction, page by page, reading the first chapter. I hope it will help you understanding what you need to change in your manga :

I get it that you're going for some kind of mysterious feel. Some pro mangaka manage very well to keep readers into their story without having to explain the characters' background, motivations or the whole situation they are in. But that's only because they know how to make you want to know all that stuff.

If you're a beginner you should start with easy storytelling : state clearly who your characters are, what their goals are and where you story is going. If not, people will stop reading after two pages.

Bad art can rebute people, but if the story's interesting enough they'll keep reading. Just look at One Punch Man.

"Alt Names: My Life as A Neet My Life as A Plagiarist"

I snorted a little.

Remove

*First frame with a poorly 3d rendered character*
*flip the bird to the screen*
*close the page*
*rant*
It's crap.

uhmm .... what

It is definitely difficult to determine the value of a story when you can't read the text due to it blending into the background art.

May I suggest that you use "stroke" on the text so that it will stand out and be easily read?

Even that dank 3D comic is better.

well that's because its made using the manga maker program called comipo!

comic sans

unironically

wew lad

Even that dank 3D comic is better.

lol Comic Sans

The person who created the cover art and the person who made the comic are not the same person.

 

The way the title and author name are shopped in should give you a hint as to the quality.

I wonder if it would be taken down for plagiarism because I'm not sure if the person who made the comic got permission to use the cover art. 

I'm not even going to criticize this manga, or make fun of it. It's just so so sad.

The person who created the cover art and the person who made the comic are not the same person.

The way the title and author name are shopped in should give you a hint as to the quality.