51 replies to this topic

[freaky]

Now.. what calamity is gonna fall upon that town... I wonder, somehow I'm starting to root for Ed >.>

[Euodiachloris]

Now.. what calamity is gonna fall upon that town... I wonder, somehow I'm starting to root for Ed >.>

I'm not. Any rooting I could have drummed up died with that smirk of his. <shivers>

[svines85]

Now.. what calamity is gonna fall upon that town... I wonder, somehow I'm starting to root for Ed >.>

Hah!! Well, if you like rooting for the bad guys he's sure a "good" one to pick

 

yeah, Kansas City doesn't know what it's in for, getting set up by the Crimson Gang along with a big reunion of sworn enemies.......not good. 

[Euodiachloris]

Kansas City Shuffle.  That is all.

[freaky]

I'm not. Any rooting I could have drummed up died with that smirk of his. <shivers>

 

and.. it ends!

*comment first, read later*

[svines85]

A good ending to a pretty good work as well. It had its flaws but overall it was a very straight forward, consistent story........which can be unusual in stories with as much action as this one had. 

 

And a fitting "American" style "western" ending, the good guys prevailing and riding off into the sunset, pretty awesome. 

[freaky]

Yeah, it's good enough. But I'm kinda confused, why's the little girl at the end called Brad "uncle"? Isn't she Luke's granddaughter?

[Euodiachloris]

"Granduncle" sounds weird... And, is rarely ever used, as a result (well, except if you're being precise about discussing your family tree for some reason).

 

Much like your first cousin twice removed is a cousin... as, are your first and second cousins cousins.

Edited by Euodiachloris, 08 October 2013 - 01:52 PM.

[svines85]

Yeah, it's good enough. But I'm kinda confused, why's the little girl at the end called Brad "uncle"? Isn't she Luke's granddaughter?

 

 

"Granduncle" sounds weird... And, is rarely ever used, as a result (well, except if you're being precise about discussing your family tree for some reason).

 

Much like your first cousin twice removed is a cousin... as, are your first and second cousins cousins.

Yeah, I can only speak for myself but when I was young and was in that situation (we used "great" uncle and opposed to "grand".......in other words my grandfather's brothers) we just called them uncle, aunts too for that matter, even though it was more than one generation. 

 

So yeah, I don't think there was any other significance or anything. I honestly didn't even realize it, I guess since it sounded normal in that situation to me.

[freaky]

Ah, I see. Thanks for the explanation, guys. It helps non native speakers like me

[Purple Library Guy]

Overall, in terms of story structure, the way the tale ended was very satisfying to me.  And I rather liked the time-skipped bit and such.

But for all the sound and fury, somehow I found the actual final fight a little lacking.  It was all the same kind of twists as usual, just one or two more of them.  And while normally that builds things up more, for Wild West fighting (which is mainly offence with little defence, and pretty high lethality) the extra twists mostly dragged down my suspension of disbelief.  I kept thinking things like "He survived another mortal wound?!" or "Do none of these tough hard-bitten ruthless bandit assassins (on either side) ever make sure someone stays down?" or "Didn't you just tell this guy's sidekick (before you killed him) never to give a man your back until you're completely sure he's dead?"

Even from an emotional perspective it felt a bit odd now and then.  It's like, the guy you hate most in the world, so much you're willing to dedicate your life to getting him, so much you're willing to die to do him in, is down and maybe out right in front of you.  Do you

1)  Scream rage and pump lead into his head until your trigger is going "click, click, click" instead of "blam!" and there's half a head left, or

2)  Ignore the possible corpse and start chatting with your brother?

Picking option (2) seems weird.

 

Ultimately this is pretty much a nitpick.  The story was good and it was a nice big final fight.  But it did niggle at me a bit.

[svines85]

Spoiler

Overall, in terms of story structure, the way the tale ended was very satisfying to me.  And I rather liked the time-skipped bit and such.

But for all the sound and fury, somehow I found the actual final fight a little lacking.  It was all the same kind of twists as usual, just one or two more of them.  And while normally that builds things up more, for Wild West fighting (which is mainly offence with little defence, and pretty high lethality) the extra twists mostly dragged down my suspension of disbelief.  I kept thinking things like "He survived another mortal wound?!" or "Do none of these tough hard-bitten ruthless bandit assassins (on either side) ever make sure someone stays down?" or "Didn't you just tell this guy's sidekick (before you killed him) never to give a man your back until you're completely sure he's dead?"

Even from an emotional perspective it felt a bit odd now and then.  It's like, the guy you hate most in the world, so much you're willing to dedicate your life to getting him, so much you're willing to die to do him in, is down and maybe out right in front of you.  Do you

1)  Scream rage and pump lead into his head until your trigger is going "click, click, click" instead of "blam!" and there's half a head left, or

2)  Ignore the possible corpse and start chatting with your brother?

Picking option (2) seems weird.

 

Ultimately this is pretty much a nitpick.  The story was good and it was a nice big final fight.  But it did niggle at me a bit.

No, you're right, I thought much the same with Luke in that final confrontation........a high-caliber sniper's bullet right through the upper body and he's back on his feet (and holding a gun no less) within ten pages or so. Yeah, not likely.

 

Of course I'd kind of given up on calling "foul" on anything after Brad came back from the dead when they were still in the Five Points.......shot, stabbed and then burned alive...........back among the living in a chapter or two. Yup, I give up, my guys just can't die, on with the story!!  \o/\o/!!