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TL/DR- Is Baam's problem simply that he doesn't see himself as a strong individual like the people around him? Could it be that his lack of confidence created by his lonesome past is what is holding him back? Are his friendships a crutch, a chain that holds him back, or his greatest asset? Is Baam simply a child afraid of being left alone like he once was?
With the introduction of the Cooker everyone is excited about Baam's potential growth in power, and even before then people have always wanted to see Baam become an over powered monster like the story seems to imply at times. However in thinking about what occurred in the latest chapter with Baam's rejection of "the power" that was offered to him, and more so, in trying to make it seem sensible to people that think he should have accepted it, a question came to mind. Does Baam think of himself as strong? Does he see himself as a capable individual able to single-handedly deal with any problems that may arrise? My thoughts on this are as follows, and I'd like anyone reading this to keep in mind that when I speak of Baam's thoughts, it is more probably how Baam thinks on the subconscious level.
Season 1 Baam definitely had a low opinion of himself and sought to become stronger alongside his friends with their help, but with Rachael's betrayal and FUG's intervention he was forced to become stronger on his own. Even Baam would have to admit that he was strong during his time as Viole, but even so, at the end of the day what saved him was his friends. If we take this back even further to his time in the cave, when Baam tried to escape on his own by building a tower he was still powerless to free himself from the cave, but through Rachael's seemingly simple effort what was once blocking his way was removed. Because of this, I have to think that Baam see's himself as someone that is powerless on his own. If Baam see's himself as such a person, then a lot of his actions make sense. He seeks friends and relationships because he feels he alone is nothing, and he denies greater power out of the fear that it would leave him alone.
However this lack of confidence in himself and a fear of loneliness may not be all negative. From a positive point of view, this mentality simply means that Baam trusts and relies on the abilities of his friends. Part of the reason he can reject a greater power is because he believes that even if he were to not become strong on his own, his friends that support him will supplement that. This is more in line with what Baam within Season 1 had initially wanted before Rachael's betrayal. More than the cut throat method displayed by others like Androssi and Ho on the Floor of Tests who valued their desires over any human relationships, Baam desired to value human relationships.
After Rachael's betrayal though, there is a clear change in Baam. While deep down he still values human relationships, it is clear that through Rachael's and FUG's actions Baam lost himself. In Season 2, as Viole, Baam started out acting as a fairly different person, but it was quickly revealed that he was still the same person. But Viole isn't really what I'm talking about, its Baam during the Hell Train Arc that is odd. Baam during the Hell Train Arc is alone. He is alone and doing whatever it takes to make himself stronger without relying on any of his friends and companions. The marital arts, the reliance on The Thorn, and the disregard for his own health all occurred from a desire to make himself stronger that Baam wouldn't normally display. I believe this occurred because of his time as Viole.
Though Baam may fear being alone, FUG forced him to be alone. FUG made it so that his presence was a danger to others, and in addition Rachael's betrayal made him question being with others. Because of this, Baam has been forced to take on the role of the strong individual. That is, until now. Through Hwa Ryun's harsh words and the God of Guardian's speech, Baam has started to think about what and who he truly is. Is he really someone capable of being strong on their own, or does he require allies? Should he make himself stronger so that his allies won't be harmed, or should he trust in his allies strength and abilities? Should he take on all the burden himself, or should he lessen it by sharing it among his friends? Is he a strong individual or is he a strong team member? Is he weak or is he strong?
As I see it, Baam initially thought of himself alone as weak or more so powerless. It is because of this that he initially both sought and valued companions, and later sought power for himself at any self sacrifice. What Baam needs to realize, is that he is indeed strong. He is strong of body and will, and if he trusts in his desire to have companions there is no reason for him to excessively burden and sacrifice himself for power. Some readers may not like that kind of conclusion, but I feel this is what is most like Baam. Baam is a child who knows the horrors of what true loneliness and powerlessness are. He was saved from that horror by others, and as such, I believe more than anything else, he would believe in the power of others.
Edited by death2boredom, 11 October 2015 - 10:28 PM.
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